Needless to say, I didn't sleep well Monday night, anticipating the next day's appointment with my oncologist. When you have a major medical test like an MRI or CT scan, you know there is always a chance things won't go the way you hope. Try as you may, that wiry, little, red devil sits on your shoulder, pokes at you with his pitchfork and makes little comments, like, "This might be the one!", just so you don't forget you will be getting information that could sharply alter your life.
I asked my friend, Kathy, to go with me. Sometimes it helps to have two sets of ears listening to what the doctor says. I found that to be very true when John was ill. After leaving, we would compare what each of us heard. Most of the time we agreed, but many times, there were subtle differences in what we heard. And, we would keep a journal. Amazing how you can forget what was said when you have so much going on in your life. And with both of us under fire, it got complicated.
Kathy and I were both prepared for whatever would be said. You have to do that.
Good news....the tumor had not changed. As Charlie Sheen would say...."WINNING!!" With that news came a sigh of relief. This type of cancer is slow growing, which is a good thing and we have it stalled for a bit longer. Though ultimately, the cancer will win unless something new comes down the drug pipeline. And a new treatment is what we are hoping for.
But, my body has been on chemo for well over a year now, plus the radiation treatments for a month.... so my oncologist says I need a break. "Your body has to heal some," he said. "The chemotherapy drugs kill good cells along with the bad ones, we have to allow time for the good cells to rejuvenate."
And that is the challenge with chemotherapy. How much can your body take before it cries, "UNCLE!"
"Okay," I said, "so what is the plan now?"
"Of the three drugs you are on, we will remove the one that is doing the most damage for awhile. You will stay on the other two. Just a few years ago, one of the drugs you will continue taking was the only one we used," he said. The drug he is talking about is the one that makes my blood pressure go up and causes lots of other chemo related problems, so it will be good to hopefully shed myself of those maladies for a bit. But, I don't want to give the cancer cells a break either. Here in lies the dilemma.
My blood count numbers were good, too. Thanks to a shot I now get after each treatment....a $4695 for each shot I might add. One tiny injection that causes my bone marrow to spit out more white blood cells and they are the ones impacted by my chemo drugs. White blood cells fight infection. (John's treatment killed his red blood cells and plasma.) You learn all these things as you walk along this path. But I am very thankful for the drug. My white blood cell count (WBC) had gotten very low. Still not sure how much was worry about John and how much was from the treatment. I'll never know, but the constant urinary tract infections and other problems I was having have certainly been better.
Here's a photo of my fingernails. You can see the difference in the color about half way down. That's how much they have grown since John died. And yes, I think it was stress. My hair fell out. It has stopped. Constant infections, weight loss, they have stopped. Do I still have problems....yes, but looks like being bald and boney won't be on the list, not just yet anyway.
So, we begin a new regime. Two of the same drugs, but now I will go back to being treated every two weeks. I had been on a three week treatment interval for the past three months. Less time between treatments, but hopefully, less side effects also.
Wing problems! Been having so much pain with my left shoulder. Went to the ortho dr and had X-Rays and MRI of the shoulder. Nothing showing up as a major problem and thankfully, no tumor growth there. That was a concern.
To be continued...
PCQ
I asked my friend, Kathy, to go with me. Sometimes it helps to have two sets of ears listening to what the doctor says. I found that to be very true when John was ill. After leaving, we would compare what each of us heard. Most of the time we agreed, but many times, there were subtle differences in what we heard. And, we would keep a journal. Amazing how you can forget what was said when you have so much going on in your life. And with both of us under fire, it got complicated.
Kathy and I were both prepared for whatever would be said. You have to do that.
Good news....the tumor had not changed. As Charlie Sheen would say...."WINNING!!" With that news came a sigh of relief. This type of cancer is slow growing, which is a good thing and we have it stalled for a bit longer. Though ultimately, the cancer will win unless something new comes down the drug pipeline. And a new treatment is what we are hoping for.
But, my body has been on chemo for well over a year now, plus the radiation treatments for a month.... so my oncologist says I need a break. "Your body has to heal some," he said. "The chemotherapy drugs kill good cells along with the bad ones, we have to allow time for the good cells to rejuvenate."
And that is the challenge with chemotherapy. How much can your body take before it cries, "UNCLE!"
"Okay," I said, "so what is the plan now?"
"Of the three drugs you are on, we will remove the one that is doing the most damage for awhile. You will stay on the other two. Just a few years ago, one of the drugs you will continue taking was the only one we used," he said. The drug he is talking about is the one that makes my blood pressure go up and causes lots of other chemo related problems, so it will be good to hopefully shed myself of those maladies for a bit. But, I don't want to give the cancer cells a break either. Here in lies the dilemma.
My blood count numbers were good, too. Thanks to a shot I now get after each treatment....a $4695 for each shot I might add. One tiny injection that causes my bone marrow to spit out more white blood cells and they are the ones impacted by my chemo drugs. White blood cells fight infection. (John's treatment killed his red blood cells and plasma.) You learn all these things as you walk along this path. But I am very thankful for the drug. My white blood cell count (WBC) had gotten very low. Still not sure how much was worry about John and how much was from the treatment. I'll never know, but the constant urinary tract infections and other problems I was having have certainly been better.
Here's a photo of my fingernails. You can see the difference in the color about half way down. That's how much they have grown since John died. And yes, I think it was stress. My hair fell out. It has stopped. Constant infections, weight loss, they have stopped. Do I still have problems....yes, but looks like being bald and boney won't be on the list, not just yet anyway.
So, we begin a new regime. Two of the same drugs, but now I will go back to being treated every two weeks. I had been on a three week treatment interval for the past three months. Less time between treatments, but hopefully, less side effects also.
Wing problems! Been having so much pain with my left shoulder. Went to the ortho dr and had X-Rays and MRI of the shoulder. Nothing showing up as a major problem and thankfully, no tumor growth there. That was a concern.
To be continued...
PCQ
2 comments:
Thanks for the update and so happy that you are holding the tumor at bay!!! It must not know YET just what a tough ufighter you are, my friend!!!
Wonderful news!
Willamina
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